At 9 years old, I had an experience at the salon that made an impression on my life for years to come.
For a long time prior to that fateful salon day, my mother took me to get my hair cut and styled. Some of these experiences with my mom were fun and some were wounding.
On this particular day, my mother and the stylists discussed what to do with my hair without bringing me into the conversation.
My opinion and feedback were not included, and the stylists proceeded to “do” my hair to my mother’s and her liking and my disliking.
I vividly recall running to our convertible car as soon as the stylist was finished. The car’s top was down and I crouched under the dashboard, putting the top up because I hated my hair so much.
This experience started the cycle of many salon appointments to follow, even into my adult life where I believed I was not the “expert of my own hair.”
Before Dressing Your Truth, I really didn’t have the information and tools I needed to be my own hair expert, which left me even more vulnerable to my stylist’s suggestions, ultimately letting her have the final say.
If you’re like me, our moms seldom asked our opinions about our own hair.
No fault to them, I don’t think they had ill intent as they were busy trying to raise children and manage many things in life. We know what that’s like now!
But because of this experience, it left many of us stuck in a pattern of giving our “hair power” to someone else.
We subconsciously transferred the deeper belief of “someone else knows what’s best for my hair” from our mothers, to our stylists!
Consider the possibility that your negative childhood experiences may have left you with the belief that you can’t get what you want from your hair appointments.
5 reasons you’re not getting what your want out of your salon experience.
I asked our DYT stylist, Nicole, to share insights based on what she sees in the DYT salon. Why don’t women get the style they truly want? And what can they do differently to start getting what they want?
1. Unrealistic expectations.
You see a certain style and don’t understand the time and effort it takes to maintain that style. Also you may not know if the style is right for the characteristics of your hair.
2. Simple miscommunication with your stylist.
It could be just a difference in vocabulary! Perhaps the words you’re speaking don’t mean what you think they mean.
Or you bring in a picture of what you want and much of what you like about the style is due to lighting or photography tricks.
3. Not planning ahead.
If you’re thinking of a significant change, call ahead and ask your stylist if they will need more time. This way, the stylist doesn’t feel pressured to do something that isn’t possible in the time allotted.
Or even worse, if there’s not enough time, your stylist may only be able to take your style/color half-way. In this scenario, nobody will be happy!
4. Lack of investment in tools and products to create what she wants.
You can get a really great haircut and then not be happy because you don’t have the right tools.
5. Being unclear about what you want,
You show up unsure about what you want before the appointment and then you expect the stylist to know. Or you defer to their opinion of what you should do.
Do you see yourself in any of the above?
You may be unintentionally setting yourself up to not get what you want! What can you change in your pattern in order to get what you want out of your experience at the salon?
Every time I go to my salon appointments, I set the following intentions the morning of my appointment:
I am grateful that I love my hairstyle.
My stylist is tuning in to what is best for my hair and what will look best on me.
My appointment is positive, I am open and clear on what I want, and my stylist is supportive.
I am knowing which products and tools are supportive to my hairstyle looking great.
I’ve gotten a lot of compliments on the latest version of my hairstyle. I am grateful my intentions are working!
What intentions do you need to set before your next appointment? Take a moment and write them down or put them in your phone with a reminder to read them the morning of your next appointment.
As our wonderful line of DYT hair care products states — “Love your hair every day! It will feel your love and want to be beautiful for you!”
Have perfect “10” hair every day!
