Are you outgoing or reserved in social situations?
But wait—your answer doesn’t necessarily determine whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert! It’s about so much more than your personality in one situation.
In this video, Anne and I shed light on how introvert and extrovert energy are expressed in my Energy Profiling system. Understanding how and why you move through life the way you do is one of the biggest gifts you can give yourself.
- (00:52) Let’s define introvert and extrovert, and talk which Type expresses which movement.
- (2:57) Why a person could feel like both an introvert and an extrovert.
- (4:14) How the stereotypes about personality and “socialness” can be an inaccurate way to assess your Type, and how to take a broader look for a more accurate assessment.
Leave a comment and share how this video supported your natural movement!
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More resources to discover and support the real you:
- What to Do When You Can’t Figure Out Your Energy Type
- A Profound Process to Know Your Type and End Self-Doubt
-
Are You a Soft Introvert or a Bold Introvert? Here’s How to Find Out
Video Transcript:
Carol: Are you an introvert or an extrovert? The answer may surprise you. Now, when I asked you that question, what did you use to assess your answer? Good chance you considered, what do I act like in social settings? Because I think most people have been taught and concluded that introvert, extrovert self-expressions are, how do you behave in social settings. You know, we have a whole different take on introvert, extrovert and the main takeaway is consider the energy profiling is a study of energy and movement. And so of course, we’re gonna to look at introvert and extrovert as qualities of movement. So Anne, give us the root meaning of intro and extro.
Anne: Intro and extro are both prefixes and intro means inward and extro means to go outward. So there’s the movement right there.
Carol: Yes. And so as I teach in energy profiling, type two and type four are introvert energies.
Anne: An inward movement.
Carol: Yes. And type one and type three are extrovert energies.
Anne: Outward movement.
Carol: Outward movement. And what this looks like is beyond social settings. It’s just, how do you engage with your day to day experience.
Anne: Beyond personality, a lot of the times yes definitely …
Carol: Beyond personality.
Anne: There’s always that question popping up in the energy profiling world, well I’m an introvert or an extrovert because I don’t like social situations or I like small groups of people. And so we define it differently in Dressing Your Truth.
Carol: Yes. And the way, it’s very simple, remember it’s movement. A type one and a type three will move forward. Their energy will move outward engaging them in action, moving forward and they’ll gather information as they go. I say type ones jump forward, type threes push forward. What happens with a type two and a type four?
Anne: Well it’d be the intro experience, type twos and type fours, they first move inward and then move forward. Like, the type twos kinda have this whoosh of a wave, that water feel, you move forward.
Carol: You get a feel for it, gather details. Where a type four will gather information, analytical.
Anne: Type fours is big picture, move forward. And this process can happen very quickly.
Carol: Very quickly.
Anne: It can even be subconscious, but there is that first response to move inward. And maybe this is a very conscious thing, depending on the situation. Sometimes it’s like, whoa, whoa, whoa, I’m moving inward, then I’m moving outward. But it’s always that initial outward or inward movement, with the one and three and the two and four.
Carol: So we really could say every person is both an introvert and an extrovert. Because, as I’m moving forward, I am processing inwardly. As I physically experience the world.
Anne: It’s kinda, what’s that first.
Carol: Yes, but first I…
Anne: [inaudible 00:03:15.288] define it.
Carol: Extrovert is first and then introvert happens while I’m moving. Yours, introvert happens first but then you extrovert yourself and you move forward. And then when we add your secondary energy where I am a three with secondary force, so I’m extrovert introvert. You’re a type two with secondary three, you’re an introvert extrovert. That really changes things up a bit, to say I have that experience of both.
Anne: Yes. And then like a four two, it would be the introvert introvert, that would be more of an inward process, which I think then that translates to social situations. But that’s only one area where that is being expressed.
Carol: Right. And a type one three combo or three one is double extrovert first. So they’re going to be just naturally more outward moving in many more settings in life. So it’s interesting, Anne and I have these extrovert introvert dominant secondary energies expressing. Of the two of us, who do you is more outgoing in social settings?
Anne: Me.
Carol: The answer may surprise you.
Anne: Yeah. Even compared to my type three husband, I’m more social. It’s something I enjoy connecting with people and while I’m doing it though, I’m very much like in my mind, is this conversation going well or I’ll go [inaudible 00:00:00] you know.
Carol: How are they feeling? Are they comfortable?
Anne: There’s that inward quality. More particularly with new people. With people I’m comfortable with and familiar with, there’s not as much processing at the time of course.
Carol: Let’s use the social setting of people you’re not with that often or people that are new. I’m not very outgoing.
Anne: No, you very much keep to yourself.
Carol: Yes. And you’re much more, you know, connecting with people.
Anne: And type ones of course will have a preference to not be as social and type fours can be very chatty. It just depends on the situation, their movement, what’s motivating them to connect with people.
Carol: How you’re feeling today. Now in a familiar group of people, I’m not always as outgoing as Anne either, just depends on the day, that I can be, if…it’s much more comfortable to me to be socially engaging with people I know well. I think we do these two references to our self-expression a disservice a bit when we just make them relative to social settings. So in the world of energy profiling, it’s a much broader look at how you move through life. It is that, do I move forward without having go with the end first, I just am able to move forward and then I process as I go or do I need to have that internal reference, whether it’s details, feelings, analysis, big picture. That’s really the correct assessment in the energy profiling world.
Anne: And that’s just one part of the entire assessment of what type you are.
Carol: Right. Don’t narrow it down to any one specific thing to say which type I am. Too often we take pieces out of it and I’ve heard just literally too many people make references to, well, I’m that type because of one thing. And I’m like that was one thing.
Anne: I think a lot of type ones in particular, because they would be kind of pegged as the most outgoing type in that they’re light, they’re bubbly, they’re maybe more socially…
Carol: There are more type ones that are more outgoing than any other type.
Anne: For sure.
Carol: For sure. We say the majority is in that particular type, they’re going to be more outgoing people, but nothing in energy profiling is a 100%. There are variables based on your background, your childhood influences, was it safe to be you.
Anne: Your secondary.
Carol: Yeah, are you timid in social settings because you weren’t supported as a child to be outgoing and you know, there’s just too many variables there.
Anne: Or supported in learning how to really, that’s something that I’ve had to practice even. So, if that hasn’t really been fostered or practiced, it might make you a little bit nervous in those certain situations.
Carol: You’ve been in many life situations that you’ve had to develop this ability to meet people, help them feel comfortable.
Anne: Carry a conversation.
Carol: Start conversation.
Anne: And there are a lot of times where I’d leave those conversations feeling like, oh, what have I said, what did I do? You know, a lot of that internalizing. We get that question a lot with type ones, are type ones all social? And so I think, especially for that group of type ones where there is kind of this picture of what it looks like, they can feel a sense of relief that, oh, that doesn’t mean I have to be the super social butterfly.
Carol: They’re the most likely though to respond very easily to someone chatting with them in a public setting.
Anne: That’s why I love my type one friends. They’re very easy to talk to.
Carol Yes. They’re very easy to talk to where that may throw off a type four or a type two may not feel as comfortable with that. So I don’t think we should reduce this down to social settings at all because all types have that variable as to whether they’re comfortable and outgoing in social settings. So remember, extrovert means your energy moves outward first. Introvert means your energy moves inward first. And if you’re overwriting that, you’re probably feeling stressed. So honoring your natural movement, whether it be extrovert or introvert, will allow you to feel more peace and ease in being you.
So share in a comment how this has helped you. Because I know this helps create some real ahas and gets rid of some old stereotypes that you may be living under because being your true self is a natural process that’s meant to be effortless.
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Thank you for creating this video! In every personality test I have taken I have been deemed an introvert. I am not outgoing or funny and I don’t crave social interactions. I was extremely shy growing up and still get uncomfortable in social situations. I am perfectly content to spend my time alone. This was my reason for initially skipping over the possibility of Type 1, as extrovert had always been associated with being social. I relate very strongly to aspects of all of the types and that is what has now led me to believe I am a Type 1. I love the Type 1 clothes and colors and it just feels natural, like I am not trying to dress up. Although, I have felt like I should be more outgoing and funny if that is what my appearance is portraying to the world. Thank you for this explanation in how extroverted energy is not necessarily a social thing. It is good to know I don’t have to be a social butterfly (as much as I love butterflies!)
Thanks Nicole I love your comment.
Thank you Carol for this wonderful program! ❤
NIcole, this is Kathy from Carol’s support team. Thank you for sharing your experience with us. We appreciate hearing from you! Your story will resonate with others, so thank you for writing.
Thank you Kathy! I appreciate all of the support and encouragement here. ❤
Thanks Carol and Anne! It’s interesting to see a different perspective to introversion/extroversion than just personality. I’m pretty sure I’m either a 2/4 or 4/2, I think I turn inward, although it all happens so fast, almost subconscious, like Anne said. For example, when I find out something new, I tend to immediately picture the future and almost watch a movie playing out in my mind of what might happen based on the little bit of information I just received. Then, once I get more information, I’ll usually see that it wasn’t what I thought it was anyway, so I either feel disappointed or relieved.
Thank you for this! Interestingly when Jung originally developed the concepts of introversion and extroversion they had nothing to do with how outgoing we are either: he said introversion described people who got their energy from being alone. And extroverts get their energy from others.
Introverts in his understanding could be quite social and gregarious, but would need time alone afterwards to regain their energy. None of it had anything to do with feeling uncomfortable around people, or feeling shy.
This definition of introversion definitely describes me: I’m a Type 2 S1 and I really enjoy being with people I like, have no trouble striking up a conversation with people I don’t know and will often lead conversations amongst groups, but I do need plenty of time to recover. I also have a limit to how much socialising I can do at any one time, and if i do too much I feel overwhelmed and miserable and get very withdrawn.
Thank you Sarah, I appreciate knowing these teachings from Jung and agree completely! A wonderful additional insight.
I’ve heard it described this way as well and it helped me see my true extrovert even though in most situations I am not the one to start a conversation, and I’m not socially outgoing. I get energized by being around people.
Thank you Sarah – I feel the same. I am a Type 4 S1.
You couldn’t have said it more perfectly. Describes me to a tee!
It’s a little sad that this thread discusses Jung while still calling it extroversion. He and most everyone in the psych field use extraversion and extraverts.
This was interesting. I’m a 2/3, but do not relate to being outgoing–at least with people. I can be somewhat more outgoing with people I know well. I’m pretty introverted all the way, though I hear a lot of 2/3’s talk about how extroverted they can be. Maybe this is just a personal thing? Maybe I don’t have a very strong secondary?
Thanks for Sharing Andrea. It could also be who influenced you when you were a child. I am pretty sure Anne has been influenced by her Type 3 mother. There are many variable in how our Energy Types develop in our childhood.
That makes sense. I grew up in a very introverted family.
Definitely, Andrea! My mom is 2/1 and I *think* my dad was 4/2. Both were very supportive of my energy, so I wasn’t pushed to do a lot of socializing or group activities. I was a lot more social during the college party scene, but my natural preference is for much less interaction. However, your S3 may just not express through being outgoing… just like my S4 does not express through organization (I wish it did!). But I do think having higher energy family members can be helpful just so the child gets more experience interacting and seeing, “oh, I can do this. It’s not hard to meet people and have a conversation!” even if it’s not their preference… as long as the child isn’t pushed or shamed into it.
As one of the T1’s that is not outgoing or chatty in social situations where I don’t know people, this video helps reaffirm that I haven’t mistyped myself when the “possibilities” of my T1 nature start causing doubts. My desire is always to go outward, but is often stopped due to the wounded feelings of that not being safe, the “details” of my S2 remembers being rejected and the sting of ridicule. Having Stephanie, the T1S2 expert has also helped show a calmer less bubbly T1 than the adorable Jaleah is.
Hi Katie, I’m so glad you found this helpful! I definitely wanted to speak to the “less bubbly” Type 1 group. I’m happy to hear it was supportive.
This video is just awesome. Really. Thanks!!!
I’m still not sure if I’m the 2/1 I’ve thought for awhile or indeed, a 1/2, but this is very much me. I’m not going to strike up a conversation with a stranger, but I’m very open to, and receptive when, approached.
I feel the same way! I don’t have a problem talking to anyone who starts a friendly conversation, I actually appreciate it☺
Thank you Carol! To whom it may concern or anyone who think they can help me to find my secondary:
Here it goes I’m originally from Russia and me and my other russian friend love DYT!!! 😀 I’m a T1 and having a lot of trouble confirming my secondary. I’ve been doing DYT for about 3 years and I am definitely T1 It transformed my life which I am very grateful for!
I’ve been struggling with a secondary: I used to think that I am S3 because of my ambition and drive to accomplish something very big, also in my personal opinion I think I have it in my looks and personality this T3 “let’s get down to business” “fiery” kinda thing and I look great when I try T3 hairstyles and make up, so that was very confusing 😀
Next changed my mind and for a while thought I was S4 because I am very-very logical/critical when it comes to me and others – I am known to being quick to give an advice(even when not needed 😛 ) and try to perfect everything + I read way too much and spend most of my time on my own, I also have most symmetrical body and face 🙂 people have told me I have an appearance of flawless porcelain skin.
NOW recently I’ve became convinced that I’m S2 because I am overly sensitive and emotional, cry over anything a story or a movie… anything too sad or too happy guaranteed to make me cry! Sometimes I even rile myself up just because I am thinking of all the sad things in the world or kittens and puppies 😀 Also a 2 thing – I absolutely can not stomach any horror movies, even some thrillers are too much! I recently gained awareness that always notice beautiful things in great detail that others don’t seem to notice(scenery, wild animals/birds, stars, etc.) Similar to that people always tell me I have a gift for sincere original compliments that no one complimented them for. One more thing I know this may sound cheesy I secretly and humbly hope to make the world a kinder place.
Besides all of this I want to add a lot of my personality traits that I live with every day. I should say I am actually a very odd/crazy person to meet, not like scary, but undoubtedly unique and standoffish(I wonder if that types me somehow? 😀 ). Of course a lot of that has to do with the fact that I am an immigrant and forced to constantly learn new things. Which I am happy to do because I am open-minded and have a huge earning for learning! I can proudly say that in 6 years since my arrival to this country with almost no knowledge of the language I’ve mastered it to this level 😉 I am happy to learn non stop: vocabulary, literature, pop-culture, humor, politics, history, philosophy to name a few, each of which is enormously fascinating to me!!! I’ve deliberately made many time-money sacrifices to learn as much as I did and I’m still going. Sometimes it’s difficult for me to form an opinion if I don’t have “all the facts” but I have such a longing to have a firm opinion! It breaks my heart that I can’t know everything about everything in great detail 🙂 When learning I always consider every side of the subject and I can truly relate to ether side of the debate and only after a time I stick to an opinion and once a clear opinion is made it’s challenging for me to change it although not impossible. In fact each year I become more and more fixed in my views and anyone who knows me today would probably call me headstrong or something :). But when it comes to it I do willingly admit that I am wrong not to sabotage my education, you definitely won’t find me clinging to something I’m unsure of, or to give out wrong facts or numbers, I say this because I notice a lot of opinionated people who would confidently give wrong facts, only then to easily let go of it when proven wrong, I could never do that! 🙂 Something that is also very unusual about me is: as long as I can remember I always seem to fight for my freedom in every way more than I wanted to fit in, most importantly ignoring what others think of me. I see others trying to fit in, but all I ever seem to want is stand out. I change a lot of jobs because I was looking for something I can be passionate about or at least very comfortable with. When I find a rare place where I fit, I don’t mind it and even start trying to be a good fit. I think I’m just trying to focus on something so much, I just don’t want anything else to stand in the way of it. One of the places if not only place where I truly fit in is the theater, especially comedy improvisation! I live for it and I don’t care that it doesn’t pay haha 😀 Every day when I get home to roommates, I only join them half of the time when they’re doing something fun, and often when I do join I feel alienated because I don’t enjoy it as much, end up being ether overly fun and playful to compensate or get very observant paying attention to every detail of the conversation, words, what everyone is wearing or something like that to moderately entertain myself 😀 and sometimes I don’t even hide my visible crankiness and boredom 😛 So to finish off this rant I would describe myself as a Type 1 who is in her head a lot lol. I go from very loud to a quiet observant person in a heartbeat. So if you’ve read this far I have a question: what should I do, I think this is who I am “effortlessly”…. or what does effortless even mean? 🙂
Ada, thank you for sharing. This is Kathy from Carol’s support team. We are grateful to hear that you and your friends are totaling enjoying Dressing Your Truth! We love to support women in living a life they Love!
Carol had mentioned at the Be You Be Beautiful event that we call upon the other 3 energies in different situations as we need them while honoring our primary energy type. From your story, it sounds as if you may be doing just that. Will you be attending the I Love My Life event in September? We would love to have you join us there where the experts will be there to support you with more wonderful insights to live a life you love while embracing your energy type! We would love to have you and some friends join us!
Thanks Sarah. They are complementary teachings as Sarah shares, Jungs teachings are in addition to what I shared in the video.
I am a 3/4 and I have found that I am the most comfortable in social situations when I am getting stuff done, or in a position of authority! But (also going by Jung standards) I lead with an Extroverted Thinking process which is very strong. I love to talk things through and get real time feed back on ideas, I do not stew on things and make decisions by myself, I love to have a sounding board 🙂
That’s another great way to describe the quality of extrovert and introvert. Thanks for sharing your insights Maggie!
Thank you for this video Carol and Anne! I’ve just decided, after a long 3 year journey, that I am a 2/1 instead of a 1/2. I feel that I process/feel things internally first before moving forward. It’s not comfortable for me to just jump in and learn the details as I go, I’d rather have a plan in place or enough details gathered before starting something new. I do love dressing as a T1, but now knowing that I know my type better, I can go in more confidently dressing as a T2 with a secondary 1. So relieving to have figured this out!
Congrats, Alicia! Thank you for sharing your success with us. Keep us posted on your journey. I’ll be seeing you over in Type 2 land. 🙂
You look really nice Anne and Carol 🙂 I have learned as a 2/1 that I feel good with spending time alone, but if I don’t have anything social at all, it makes me miserable at some point! need the balance 🙂
Thank you for noticing.
From the time I was young, I considered myself an introvert because I preferred being alone. I now realize that this was conditioned in me due to having had some experiences that taught me it was not safe to be myself around others, especially my peers. Now that I have healed that part of me, I still consider myself an introvert in the sense that I need alone time to recharge, but I do need lots of social engagement to feel fulfilled in my life. As a T3, I easily push forward to create the social experiences that are meaningful to me. So I would say that it’s important not to mistake a lack of confidence with introversion, as I did growing up.
Thank you so much for this excellent explanation! As a 2/4, the stereotype is that I should be the quietest, most-reserved person in the room (or hide in the bathroom). That’s not always the case. I can actually sometimes out-talk higher energies :). But just as you said, I need time to process internally first (who is here, what’s the overall mood, what’s my role?), then move forward. I think for introverts, taking that time can feel awkward and like others are watching you and thinking, “oh, that poor shy person!” when it’s like, “hey, I just need a little time here!” I easily speak up in work meetings (I like my opinions to be heard) and don’t mind public speaking (where my role is clear). I don’t really like big parties where I know all the people, because there is just so much internal processing required, as I mentioned above! I actually am more comfortable at big events where I don’t know many people, like with my husband’s work colleagues, or an out of town convention. That said, my T4 husband and I don’t seek out large social events – it’s just not our preference. We’d rather just be with each other or a couple other people.
Thank you! I am a T2 with a possible S4 but I haven’t been able to really settle into that secondary because I keep thinking that a 2/4 would be sooo quiet and shy and I don’t see myself that way at all. Like you said, I can be very vocal and outgoing at times, but I guess it kinda just has to be to the point where I’m comfortable with and somewhat in control of the situation. Very interesting!…
I’m in the same situation, Makenzie: how are you doing? Any progress? Tips? 😉
I am considering that I might be a s3, but the way my mind works tells me that my T2 is followed by a s4… And, although I am certainly an introvert, some of the stereotypes of 2/4 are so not me… I’m really confused, to be honest. I guess I may be overthinking it. But I’m interested in hearing your experience or anyone else’s in the same situation of course!
When I first started dyt I knew I was thought I was a t2. Then after getting to know it more and delving more into secondaries and such I decided I was a 2/1/4/3. Then after about a year or so I decided I was actually a 2/4/1/3. I felt more peaceful about that decision, and I think it was because I was relieved I didn’t have to be a bouncy, cheerful s1. But I still didn’t feel “settled in” as a 2/4. I posted on the unofficial “guess my type” Facebook page and most everyone that commented said I looked like a 2/3. I was SHOCKED because since the beginning I was sure that t3 was what I LEAST related to. After thinking about it some more I decided to give it a chance. I immediately started noticing so many things that I do that I think are definitely s3 qualities. So… I am officially a 2/3 and I love it. I have a soft, push forward energy and I’m glad to know that I don’t have to be an “invisible” t2 cuz I have my s3 to help me be recognized.
There. That’s my story! 🙂
Thanks for sharing, Makenzie! It’s interesting because I was having a rather similar experience with my “quest” to discover my secondary but two days ago I had a revelation. I’m going to share it here, in case it helps somebody 🙂
I’ve realised I was stuck because I don’t really like my type. I felt relieved and so “at home” when I first identified I was type 2… and it came like a heaven’s present, just in a moment when I was doing therapy and “rediscovering” myself after a period of relative darkness. But then I think it opened some old wounds: I wasn’t aware, but I was secretly looking for my secondary because I thought that it wasn’t safe to be “just” type 2. I believed (and I guess I still do, as I write these words) that I should be something more, not “plain, vulnerable and invisible type 2”. And the strange thing is I always felt type 2, loved type 2 style and world, and admired type 2 ladies of this community (starting with Anne Tuttle)…but somehow it wasn’t safe to me. It all comes from my childhood and some family dynamics I’m currently working on…but I’m cretainly surprised by this finding, because I didn’t know that, subconsciusly, I still am afraid of presenting my true self to the world. Even when I said I had “prejudices” against/about other types…I was blind and did not see that type 2 (myself!) was the most misjudged. I feel sad but, at the same time, kind of relieved…if that makes any sense. I still don’t know my secondary for sure…but I’m feeling some things with type 3 that make me remember Michelle’s experience. It is fun though that all this confusion starts with something so type 2 as self doubt and second guessing… It seems, after all, I’m being myself even when I’m trying to figure out who am I!
To be continued (I suspect)…
It’s all part of the process! Trust the process! Best of luck!
“Trust the process”: I think I’ll have this sentence printed and framed, because I love it 😉 Thank you!
I want to see if I understand this correctly. So 1’s and 3’s will act first and think about it as they go. Type 2’s and 4’s will think before they act. I strongly believe that I am a Type 1. Im not one to start a conversation with those I don’t know but I am open to others engaging with me! The only thing is…I have to think about things before I act. I can’t do things on the spot or I become a nervous mess lol. Can Type 1’s be this way?
Thank you for posting this. For years, I considered myself to be “the introvert’s introvert,” so I was shocked and surprised to realize that I’m a 3/1! Both of my parents are 2’s and both of my siblings are 4’s, so I grew up in a much lower movement, internal environment. I also worked in the fashion industry and wore a lot of black, and when I stopped wearing black, the color I would wear the most was grey. When I wore black and grey, I had no energy — it completely supported my belief that I was a lower-energy, lower-movement person, and I needed a tremendous amount of down-time to recover from social situations, if I even approached them. Since getting on the DYT path, it’s been like taking the lid off! I no longer feel drained by social situations, I seek out social situations, and I don’t need as much alone time to recover. By Carol’s explanation, I can see that I have always moved outwardly first — I’m very much a hit-the-ground-running kind of person — and then processed, quite deeply, on the go. It has been such an eye-opening experience to see that one of my most deeply held beliefs about myself was actually a product of conditioning and energy mis-alignment! I’m certainly not one of the highest of the high movement, social butterfly 3/1’s (you’ll never see me at an amusement park!), but I can fully embrace myself now as a strong, push-forward movement with a lot of light, animation, and sparkle.
Rebecca this is Kathy from Carol’s support team. Thank you for sharing! We love to hear from women whom are embracing the tools that Carol and the experts share. Your story will resonate with many!
Interesting how energy draining the colors and being dominated by other types are…..I am definately going to take that into consideration. Thanks for sharing!
This was so helpful! Thank you! I’m 1/2. There were a lot of helpful things shared, but one was the fact that if I’m not honoring my dominant movement, I will feel stressed. I easily engage in conversations with strangers, but for a few years, before I found DYT, I tried being more quiet and letting them talk first when meeting new people. Looking back, it was much more stressful than just “jumping” into a conversation with them. I needed to hear this. Great aha’s again! Ha Ha!
This makes perfect sense in my 3/2 life – extrovert introvert. Thank you!
AHA! When I was a child, I was told that I was shy when I was standing quietly and politely as my mum had a conversation with an aquaintance. I would have been told off by my mum if I had spoken. (I knew my place)
Ever since, I became more quiet when out and about ending up a very shy teen.
I am 54 now and not at all shy, but it took some work to climb out of my shell!
I have come to realize that this is me also, Teri. Through energy healing, I now realize that I learnt at the very young age of 3 to bring my Secondary 2 out for everyone to see as my Type 1-ness was too much for anyone. I was the eldest so that also came into play… Sneakily, I’d still like to have it confirmed by someone in ‘authority’ that I’m a 1/2, but I’m learning through Lifestyle and the amazing ALL types Facebook page, more about each type. <3 this tutorial and the "But I'm Not The Life of The Party" one also. Amazing clarifications!! Awesome!
I’am a 4/1 – but in social situations I am more 1 than 4. I enjoy to be outgoing or chatty… but after that I need silence and time alone.
Would you guys say you are very quiet/serious/not outgoing? I know my primary is a 2 but I have been trying to decide on my secondary, either a 1 or a 4. I started out thinking I was a 2/1 but now I’m thinking 2/4, but I keep second guessing becasue I feel like a 2/4, having both lower energy types, would be suuuuper quiet and serious and not at all social and I don’t feel like that’s me. Thoughts?
I’m fairly quiet and I’m not outgoing. I sometimes look serious or thoughtful but I don’t take things too seriously, I’m pretty easy going and adaptable. I’ve been considering 2/1 lately as well. Actually, I think Carol said that Jerry Seinfeld is a 2/4 and he certainly isn’t that serious so anything’s possible, there are a lot of variations even among 2/4’s.
Thanks Carol and Anne. What great teachers! I can see how I am definitely an introvert even though I have social skills to move forward after I go inward first. Makes sense. Thanks for the clarification. As I watched I could see how my former career as an administrator forced me to push forward as a T3 daily, so that would explain the health problems that arose, as I could not keep up with that on a daily basis.
I thought to be a 1 but when i´m together with my husband usually strangers begins a conversation with him. He´s a 2/1. That makes me a bit sad, because i love conversations but prefer only with people i know. With strangers or in new situations i prefer to oberserve the people and the environment first and then, if i´m feel confortable , i talke to them.
I’m a 3/4 and I have no problem engaging with people in social settings when the event relates to something I want to learn more about or is something I find interesting. I have very little patience for small talk or gossip, and I will seek out someone with whom I can converse about “meatier” topics or even interesting trips they have taken. I am that person who will offer to hold someone’s baby or play with children or pets at a house party to avoid being “pinned down” in a conversation that is going nowhere. I even do kitchen cleanup!
I’m a 3/4 and I am exactly like you. I hate small talk and gossip too.
Omg…that totally is me and helps with my secondary. I have been debating between 2 and 4 but last night I did that at the family function. I held or played with every kid because the different ‘groups’ usually talk about the same small stuff and anything I interject or want to change topic is blown off. The lack of ‘meatier’ topics as you put it and the lack of movement of just sitting and talking usually have me stressed out about half way through dinner.
I feel like I’m a type1, but my husband says I’m not happy or fun enough to be a T1. I have really bad anxiety and depression, but I feel “most at home” when watching the type ones. I don’t feel very light, though. But I also feel my secondary is a 4, so I don’t know if that plays a role in how outgoing I am.
I feel like my whole life experience is me finding something new, immediately wanting to try it, but then reigning myself in, reminding myself of how bad it could turn out.
Also, I have quite a bad temper And I’m easily overwhelmed. And I’m not sure if type ones have bad tempers or get overwhelmed easily.
I look at my face and I can’t tell at all. I just see the parts. Small Bassett hound eyes, pointy uneven eyebrows, red cheeks (rosacea), and jowls. :/
Jessaca, I feel you have a lot of healing to do which is masking your true Type, whichever that may be. Search Lifestyle for some healing tutorials to start your journey to health. Sending love and healing energy for your amazing journey. <3
As a child I was always told I to settle down, stop moving. Also, as I grew up I was told I was immature and random and that I would amount to nothing in life. I had typed myself as a 4/1 but I’m now thinking I’m a 1/4. I’m more of a 4 now but I think it may be conditioned from childhood believing my energy was somehow wrong. Thank you very much! Great video and program!
You say that Type One’s JUMP forward first, then gather and process information along the way. Can you tell us what that information-gathering looks like? I progress forward VERBALLY… I have to talk things through. Just ask my husband and my son! My son often says “Mom, does every thought that pops into your head have to come out of your mouth?” I do talk a lot to myself as I’m processing the situation i’m moving forward in. Is this common mostly in 1’s? My husband is a 3 and he never does that.
I am a 1/2 and I process verbally at times, and inwardly at time, too, depending on the situation… ie… if I’m in the car driving, I’m always chatting away (even to myself) about what is coming up or how we could work on a situation etc… If I’m at work, it’s inward, but I’d prefer it to be outward once I gather my details (which is quick, usually). Not sure if this helps you <3
Thank you Kiara- it does help and I can totally relate… I know what you mean about gathering details quickly. What would be helpful here are some specific examples of how each type “jumps” forward and then gathers info… Or moves inward first… I’d love to see Anne and Carol give an example in their daily life of how this plays out. By the way- I”m a 1/2 too! 🙂
I finally figured it out- by watching the morning routine video! After listening to Kalista and Anne talk about how they like to go “inward” FIRST thing in the morning… BEFORE they go outward into daily activities… A light bulb went off for me! I CANNOT do that. I cannot go inward before I’ve gotten “caught up” on everything in the outside world… I turn on the TV first thing. I open the windows to let in the fresh air from outside. I check in with my husband and son to see how they are doing. I check on the pond outside to see how it’s doing. I get my little chores done to make my space feel warm and cozy and perfect for me to relax in… THEN (and only then) do I feel ready, right, comfortable, and safe to relax and go inward (honoring my yin energy) to do my writing. And drink my coffee! 🙂 I cannot go inward without first going outward… I’m an extrovert!! And type one! Whew… I feel SO MUCH better knowing that. That’s why I say- you gotta watch ALL the videos… You never know where your “Aha” moment will come from- sometimes it comes from the unlikeliest of places.
Every little bit helps to understand introvert/extrovert tendencies. Carol are you aware of new book called “The 4 Tendencies”? Seems to be along these same lines but has to do with if you would keep commitments to others &/or self. Apparently there are 4 tendencies that would mirror the 4 energy types. I am on waiting list to read this book. Maybe a resource for future interview material? As a 3/2, I’m an awesome resource specialist!
FYI.
This was so helpful! I am a 3/1, pretty sure, but I’ve questioned that because I’m not a social butterfly and lately have had many nights where I’d prefer to just stay home and veg than to go out. While I get energized being around friends, I always feel anxious in new social situations or with people I don’t know as well. I’m terrible at initiating small talk, but I’m almost always happy to chat with someone else if they are the ones who initiate the conversation! And once I’m comfortable around people I can be the life of the party, It just takes me a while to warm up. I was beginning to question if I’d typed myself right, even though almost all the material continually points me to 3/1… so it’s reassuring to hear that I don’t have to fit this perfect 3/1 mold of outgoing high energy, that there is room for variation.
But what about “introvert” being those who get energized by being alone (drained when out or talking with others), and “extrovert” being those who are energized by being with and talking with others? I get what you are saying about how all types can be chatty… Are you saying that the true definition of introvert/extrovert applies to every type? You sort of changed the definition in the video…
This was super helpful!! I’m a type 1 but not super outgoing socially! i was labeled as “quiet” as a child as well but . I feel pretty confident that I’m a type one woman so I’m going with it!! I’m also not super talkative and feel a bit socially awkward but when i am comfortable with people i am very chatty!