How the DYT Beauty Experts Determined Their Secondary Energy

I had a very hard time typing myself! As a 1/4, (still do second guess myself on my type btw, too many details/possibilities!) I got hung up on details by focusing on them. An example would be crying. I Feel things very deeply and find meaning in everything (secondary 4.) I thought that meant I was a Type 2 or had a secondary 2. So I would focus on specific details and get very confused about what they meant missing the bigger picture. My Secondary 4 is very Feeling focused and so I appear to have a lot of Type 2 traits. (I’m an ENFP rather than the commonly ‘expected’ ENTP for a 1/4 as a result of being so emotional/feeling focused. My enneagram Triad is 6/4/1 in case that helps.) I am also not very extroverted at all in a general sense, and my extroverted nature only comes out if I want to make someone feel good (complimenting a stranger for example) or if I am very comfortable with the people I’m with, I will share myself with them, one on one. I am very quiet in groups and often don’t say much unless I can bring light and encouragement to an individual, and that will only happen one on one. I know that I lead with my Type 1 because I see all the possibilities in everything and my primary motivation is to help heal people (of course I want to do that perfectly, and will often question myself and analyze things after the fact, wondering if I could have done things better/more effectively.) I did sit down and try to figure out what percentage of each Type I have in me (which confused me further when I learned that that is a Type 4 way of approaching DYT,) and my T4 is Very strong in me, however, I Still see the possibilities that I could be any of the 4 Types after 3-4 years of reading about Types, and a Type 4 would be more sure and solid in their knowing.

To confuse things, I didn’t Want to be a Type 1 because I couldn’t see anything positive in that Type. I wanted to be more introverted because I believed that if I led with a 2 or a 4 I could finish what I started/write a completed novel. Now I realize my Type 1 makes me the quirky, compassionate, empathetic, and creative woman that I am, and love. My hope is that the more I heal, the more I will be able to balance my 1/4 energies and write the many novels I have inside of me. I have very little Type 2 or Type 3 energies, and I often feel imbalanced and I have learning disabilities. I have a theory/hope that the more I am able to balance and accept my 1/4 nature, the more energy (pun intended!) I’ll have to connect with my Type 2 and 3 energies and the disabilities will heal as a result. I have a hard time making connections and that is integral to novel writing and storytelling, and I hope I can learn these skills. (I would love it if you’d talk more about how to tap into the energies we are weaker in. If you have materials like that that I’ve missed, please let me know!)

Regarding the clothes, I also thought I was a Type 2 for a time because I adore Type 2 styles. Bell sleeves are my favorite because they are quite romantic and expressive; bell sleeves are also unique and interesting. In the beginning, I found most Type 1 (and even Type 4) clothes boring and lacking in expression! I didn’t care for t-shirts and cardigans or striped shirts, etc. because they feel too bland and they lack emotion/expression which I find boring and limiting. If you don’t like the clothes that match your Type, try and figure out why. My Type 1 desires bright, funky, creative expression in my clothing, while my Type 4 craves something unique that makes a statement (and in my case, expresses what I’m feeling that day.) Bell sleeves, for example, are whimsical and ethereal, and I want to evoke that feeling often, and the Type 1 clothes don’t fit that feeling for me. Now that I’m a bit further into DYT, I’m learning/allowing myself to layer colors and fabrics to make something uniquely my own and to feel creative in my wardrobe. I still love bell sleeves, and even though they aren’t Type 1 per say, they are a part of my wardrobe. I even wear chiffon dresses, in my colors, with detailing that gives an ethereal feel, and I get so many compliments! Once you know who you are, you can make the principles and the ideas work for you, but be patient with yourself. It’s an ongoing, always evolving process, with a long and wide learning curve!

I’m sharing this in the hopes that it might help others who are struggling to find their types. I’ve spoken to a couple of other people during DYT events via chat that are confused and get stuck on details the same way I did and I thought it might help to bring that up. I also wanted to share that if you have a bias towards a particular type (a positive Or negative bias) that might be keeping you from seeing who you really are until you clear up those biases. I wanted to be a Type 2 because I wanted to be soft and subtle and caring and nurturing. I wanted to make other people feel good. I didn’t want to be a Type 1 because I thought they were silly and didn’t have enough value. (I learned that from my extremely unhealthy and emotionally abusive mother.) I used to believe my mom would love me if I was a Type 2 or even a Type 4. She doesn’t really know how to love. I know I’m not alone in these blocks to finding out our true natures, so if this sounds like you, it’s ok. You can love you, your Type/Secondary is beautiful, and you don’t have to be like your Mom or anyone else if you share their Type. (At some point I didn’t want my Secondary 4 because my Mom has a lot of 4 in her. It isn’t her Type that makes her toxic, it is her past, life experience, and choices, etc.)

I have been living in my Secondary 4 for so long, it’s overpowered and overshadowed my Type 1. I’m still struggling to accept that my Type 1 has value and to let her out; she’s been invalidated and punished for SO long. Thank you so much Carol, and ALL, for being part of my healing journey. If you’ve read of all this, thanks for reading, and I wish you love, clarity, and healing on your journey! xoxo ~<3~ Rachel

Type 2 and lots of clothes that don’t match? I used to make a clothes pile of all the undies, bras, T-shirts, etc. that didn’t match and pick one solid color I liked as a dye – cherry or purple or green. Then throw the whole pile into the washer with dye. Watch the fantastic result- due to different amounts of cotton, nylon and other threads within the clothes the dye will pick up or not. The blends and contrasts all match together- a great and speedy way to have so many more clothes to mix and match.

I just love this video. There is such truth to the fact that being able to use the resources to determine my own type, rather than have someone TELL me what type I am, is freeing and empowering. It took me forever to figure out my type. But, if I had been told my type, I think that there would have been so many times I’d have doubted or questioned the information. Having come to the conclusion on my own helps me to feel so confident in the decision, and if I do have a fleeting doubt, I think back to all of the reasons why I am usually certain that I’m a Type 1!

If only I had seen this video at the beginning of my journey… It would have saved me so much hassle. Taking what was natural for me instead of trying to be someome else. I was resisting. Actually, the more you heal your soul the clearer your type becomes. I have healed tremendously through all my journey in DYT. I tried every type. And deep inside, I was my type 4/3 all along. Going all or nothing into every type I tried, with all the push that I could. I have got to know myself incredibly well.

If only I had listened to “what is effortless” “what is natural”… I like to come back to this club night often. Very valuable.